Distraught inside an hourglass
Shoveling sand to make time last
So much time has already pass
Distraught inside an hourglass
Can’t let go of the life he has
Soon a dark shadow will be cast
Distraught inside an hourglass
Shoveling sand to make time last
Syl65's Blog 
The imagery of someone trying to shovel more sand into an hourglass to prolong their life is fantastic! Love the subject you chose for the triolet. You rendered the form beautifully. Terrific job! 🙂
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Thank you Cubby! It was a good exercise. I wanted to come up with something special. Looking forward to more challenges. You’re awesome!
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Nice and so much tension filled in the sound of the poem. You know how they say “Make hay while the sun shines”. It reminds me of that. Well written.
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Thank you Rexie! It was fun writing.
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This is great – like Cubby I was really taken by the imagery which was somewhat amusing but very serious all at the same time.
Did you write the rhyming lines first? That’s what I did, I found it got harder after that 😉
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Thank you Pooky. Yes, Once I got my first two lines, then I went from there. Counting syllables on my fingers was kind of fun. It got hard around the fifth line and then I was able to come full circle.
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I loved it – it feels very natural
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I wanted the visual to be as vivid as possible. Almost claustrophobic.
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You certainly achieved your aim!
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Thanks for your feedback. I appreciate it 🙂
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